The Yellow Wallpaper

The Yellow Wallpaper

        After finishing reading the fiction, my mood was really bad not just because the weird story, but for someone important in my life. I know, the woman (the narrator) has severe depression like my dear friend.

About depression (I found this information on line)

        Depression is a mood disorder that causes people to feel sad, hopeless, or fear for an extended period of time. Depression can cause people to become incapable of communicating, unable to do routine activities, or suicide. Common symptoms include: depressed mood; inability to enjoy activities,  problems concentrating; poor memory; difficulty making decisions; changes in eating habits; weight gain or weight loss; changes in sleeping habits; difficulty going to work or taking care of  daily responsibilities; feelings of guilt and hopelessness;  wondering if life is worth living; slowed thoughts and speech; preoccupation with thoughts of death or suicide; complaints that have no physical cause such as headache and stomachache.  As far as I know, most depression patients choose jump out of the window to suicide.

About the narrator

        From what she said in her diary (might be), I can tell her disease becomes worse. There are some clues. She takes medicine “phosphates or phosphites” which are the typical medicines for depression. The narrator could not take care of her kids by herself, she could not do housekeeping, and she also could not normal communication with his husband and other friends. She is always tired. “I cry at nothing, and cry most of the time.” She gains weight and her sleeping habit changes. At last she did have the idea of jumping out of the window. She becomes sensitive and get angry with John without any reason. Also, she feels guilty to his husband and kids. “I meant to be such a help to John, such a real rest and comfort, and here I am a comparative burden already!” Then, she turns her range into the wallpaper, actually herself. It is her feeling of guilty that makes her range. She could see sin, outrage, and other things from the wallpaper actually that because she has those feelings.  At last, she totally becomes the woman in the wallpaper. I ever think that if the author change the wallpaper to mirror that would have more incredible effect.

About her husband

Since she is the first narrator of the whole story, sometimes, I can feel her dissatisfaction with her husband. However, I would say that her husband is actually thoughtful, careful and loving her very much. In order to help her wife to recovery, he rent a beautiful house. He relieves her feeling and does whatever good to her wife. He encourages her wife to use her will and self-control to fight with the disease. “And dear John gathered me up in his arms, and just carried me upstairs and laid me on the bed, and sat by me and read to me till it tired my head.” He tells her that fancies are not good to her. The narrator knows that her husband loves her. “Dear John! He loves me very dearly, and hates to have me sick.” I am not believed what she said because it is too objective. “He said I was his darling and his comfort and all he had, and that I must take care of myself for his sake.” I can sense her husband is really care about her and hope to help her. "Your exercise depends on your strength, my dear," "and your food somewhat on your appetite; but air you can absorb all the time.” He is so gentle. That might be the reason for her guilty feelings.  

        Actually, she tried, she tried to control her fancies, but she failed at last. I understand depression is really an evil disease, and it will need a very strong will to fight with.